Scattergood Journal — February 1970

February 1, 1970

I finished reading Dag Hammarskjold, a Spiritual Portrait by Sven Stolpe. The book increased my interest in and admiration of the man who I can identify with in part. Not in his apparently vast intellectual capacities and reserves or his creative writing talent, but in aspects of his life. In his youth, apparently, he found it difficult to talk with his peers-they couldn’t understand him. He therefore only answered what was specifically asked of him, and only asked for information he knew others could give him. He spent much time reading and questioning himself. He followed a lonely path others didn’t even recognize as Christian. And then, when called into public service, he knew the time had come and he gave himself to the task.

I feel similarly in my search for meaning in life. It’s hard to communicate with anyone about it. And yet I have begun to find meaning in life, I believe, at times, and have followed a lonely path, tried to follow the path of Jesus.

“When all my hopes in them and in all men were gone, so that I had nothing outwardly to help me, nor could I tell what to do, then, o then, I heard a voice which said: there is one, even Christ Jesus, that can speak to thy condition.”  George Fox

February 18 Wednesday

Five of us, with Kent van Zant, went to the silent vigil in Iowa City today.  It was around 30 degrees and rather windy, but much worth the trouble and inconvenience.

Those of us in the social concerns group have been fasting today. The Laymen Concerned about Vietnam and Fellowship of Reconciliation are sponsoring vigils (Wednesdays) during the Easter season.

February 21, 1970

I got my letter of acceptance from Earlham College today. At first I was very happy–acceptance at a college is acknowledgement of certain achievements. One is also relieved, secure in the knowledge that, if one desires, he can attend classes and have room and board at a place and in an environment agreeable to him.

And now I have gradually been drawn back to my question as to the validity of this type of education.

I was talking to Dave Barrett this evening. He graduated last year, has turned in his draft card, and for the past year has just been traveling around. That’s what I’ve been considering doing this summer.

I felt very close to my friends today as they congratulated me for being accepted. I will always be grateful to Scattergood for providing me the opportunity to develop such deep personal relationships with such fine kids.

February 28, 1970

Last night attended a dinner and discussion “toward a community to resist the draft” at the meetinghouse/AFSC office in Iowa City. It was very nice to get together with people  much like yourself who think much like you do.

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